well whatever man,

On that very day when i asked you the question, that was the day i was expecting a whole new chapter in my life. And i wont say you gave the chance to me, but i gave you a chance for once to actually get a nice guy who will actually be there, entertain the emotions, and most importantly be loyal to you. I guess you just don't appreciate me, no one ever did, you're all the same. Every girl i have liked/loved took me for granted, thinking i will be there clinging on no matter what cos im nice and all that bullshit. I guess that chance was a mistake, probably one of the biggest mistakes i ever made. Despite so many people telling me i deserve better and not to go for someone like you, i still decided to go for it because i believe in giving people a chance. You said you changed, you said you aint like what you were in the past, but how can i believe that? Everything im seeing is exactly what people warned me to watch out for. When you said yes to the question, i expected devotion, i expected sacrifice, compromising, but no, i did not get nothing. You were just that same old girl, out every night, clubbing, drinking, socialising. I know how you told me so many times, "oh its my lifestyle, it's hard to change" but any human being who really loves the other party, would alter their life for the better of both people. I wont even consider our 27 days a relationship, it was a joke. All the reasons you gave me, bout my sis and germaine affecting you and my mum and your past and all that. Nothing should affect a relationship is you love someone. And i know, i KNOW you dont love me for the person i am on the outside. I know i'm not the kind of guy you would ever go for, from my dressing to my attitude to my personality. I am a bum, i am a slacker but so what? love should not be based on what i am or what i wanna be or what i want for a career in future. I know we are worlds apart, we are completely opposites. U hate bikes to the core but it happens to be my love, so what can be done bout that? Im not asking you to sit behind, im not asking you to pay for it, im not asking you to cry if i get into an accident. I do it on my own account and i take responsibility for it. When we talked for about an hour yesterday i asked you if u really loved me, it took you so long just to answer me "yes..... Youre nice what". Is that the kind of reply a bf would wanna hear? The yes sounded like a forced yes cos im on the phone. And when i asked so you only love me because im nice? and you said "yah youre nice what". If only i could cry when i heard that, but no it's not worth. You do not make me a priority at all. Your social life and friends mean loads more i know, it's ok. I dont even know them. I dont even know if you do anything with them. You can't even sacrifice one night to come to my area and maybe sit by the beach, no u cant. Reason? "It's far and i dont have a straight bus home. Don't you cab everywhere? If its clubbing or drinking sure midnight charge no problem. I came back from Bali have not seen u more than a week, until today actually i have not seen u since i came back, why? youre sleeping because of all the shit u do or you rather go out with friends. 2 days in a row you said it was for me, you said we'll go out, but no call, no message only on the second day night u texted me saying why i never msg u whole day? is it my fucking duty to start every single message every single day? that shows you dont care. You say im sensitive, i think too much, but look at what youre doing to me, you dont even act gf material when youre with me. I'm looking for a commitment relationship, an honest relationship, and this is totally not it. And when i go, i will go for good. So stop living in lalaland thinking life is a bed of roses and every night is party night. Once day reality will hit you smack in the face and you'd be so unprepared. It's a real world out there and everything does not revolve around how you feel and what makes you happy. So pull yourself together, i'm done.